To Whom I Run
When you scraped your knee when you were little, who did you run to? Your answer was probably one of your parents. That is the common answer when we think of a safe place to run to. Our parents are there to raise us, love us, guide us, and comfort us like when we get hurt. Growing up I knew I could always run to my parents when I needed something, especially my mom. I remember a time when I felt like my whole world had shattered in high school. Some of my closest relationships had fallen apart and I was devastated. I remember going outside, sitting on the driveway and just crying. A few moments later, I heard the front door open and soon felt my mother’s arms around me. She sat there as long as I needed to and cried with me. She told me later that it hurt her to see me hurt and in pain. This statement made me think about the depth of a mother’s love. God has given parents, a special depth of love for their children. I love that, God, being a parent Himself, poured this kind of love into earthly parents.
Along with the love that my mom poured into me, she gave me the greatest encouragement and guidance.
Life would have its moments of uncertainty and confusion, resulting in me running to my mom. Whether it was something small and simple or far larger than me, she was there to listen, lift me up, advise, and cover the situation in prayer. These times were precious to me, watching her handle things that were not her own with such grace, patience, love, and prayer. I felt peace whenever I came to her and knew that things would be okay. Then when she left this world, I felt like my safe place had left with her. The feeling of being a lost child in a vast world crept in. Now I know that there are others around me, that care and love me, but nothing can quite fill the void left by a mother. I have since struggled with this feeling as I have started new chapters in my life. Starting college, finding a new job, moving, and so forth.
But remembering my mom and our moments together, I am drawn back to the One that she leaned on. Though my mom was a comfort, she was given that ability from her Heavenly Father. He is the One she lifted her hands to and asked for guidance from. Looking at my mother’s life, I can see Jesus in everything she did. She was truly an extension of Jesus and set an example for me as well as others. Her life is a lasting blueprint for life and relationship with God. She clung to her Heavenly Father during every difficulty, storm, and battle she faced. She pointed the ones that looked up to her, to their real help in signs of trouble. She walked along side many as a catalyst for Jesus to move through her. She placed her trust in Him and His promises.
Over the past couple weeks and especially the past couple days, I have found myself overwhelmed by life. The feeling of defeat, uncertainty, worry, and loss has consumed me. I have seen this time as an attack of evil, as God has been working in my life. I am reminded of two verses that my mom would share with me in these times- John 10:10 “The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.” Evil is out to discourage you and break you down. But this is not God’s will for your life, He is there to give you life. Along with the verse, Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”.
I have to constantly remind myself of these things and even then struggle. So I wanted to share this as a reminder for myself as well as anyone feeling the same way. Whatever stage of life you are in, we all fall to this state of worry, defeat, or sense of loss. You are not alone in this or any less because you feel this way throughout life. This world is not easy, but you are forever accompanied by an ever-loving Father. Let your heart and mind run to His open arms. Rest in His peace and comfort, knowing that the future is in His hands. That He makes plans for you to prosper and will equip you with what you need to succeed.
This is my reminder and now it’s yours.